How people speak to their friends, is usually very polite. We say please and thank you, we are nice on the phone. With family especially close family, communication often degenerates and we are not so polite.
Many studies have found that many marriages start the slippery slope to divorce because of little things. What are some of the problems? Many are avoidable. For example, one person squeezes the toothpaste one way, from the bottom, and the other from the top. How to solve this problem, buy two tubes of toothpaste!
When you are speaking to your spouse, and on a day like today which is a fast day, be extra careful and be polite.
Now, we get to my real point here. If we have to be very careful of how we speak to our friends and family, how about how we speak to ourselves? My stepmother in Philadelphia told me this story this week. You know that in Philly it is very cold. She had to go out early in the morning to go to work, and instead of taking the keys, you know the ones which have all the keys to the house and the car, she took by mistake a different key chain. She didn't notice until she got on the other side of the front door, which closes automatically, locking itself.
She was outside at 7:30 am, no keys to the house, no keys to the car. She did have her purse and the cellphone! Thank goodness for that. While she was outside, she could have chosen to speak to herself in two ways, one positively or negatively. Which is the one that we most usually choose? Yup, you guessed it, the negative way. In the end, she called a locksmith and lots of money later, was able to get into her house, and get the car keys and off to work.
Does speaking negatively to ourselves, putting ourselves down really help the situation? It is like trying to write an important report for work when there is heavy construction taking place in your building the floor below yours. The noise can be so loud that you really don't think and can't find the solution to your problem.
If you can't find your car keys and you are looking for them, which is a better self-talk?
"Oh, I never find my keys! I'm so stupid for losing them, all the time!" Or " I put my keys in a really good place, now where would that be? "
I opt for the second. It is more helpful and leads me on the path to find the keys.
Rachael Alice Orbach
Life Coaching is the way to move ahead and get to your goals!
052-750-0608 call now for your 1st session for 50NIS
Rachael Alice Orbach Certified Master Life Coach - American University of NLP Certified Master NLP Practitioner - American University of NLP B.A.- UCLA Los Angeles www.lifecoachjerusalem.weebly.com Blog: www.lifecoachjerusalem.blogspot.com Skype: life-coach-jerusalem 052-750-0608
Many studies have found that many marriages start the slippery slope to divorce because of little things. What are some of the problems? Many are avoidable. For example, one person squeezes the toothpaste one way, from the bottom, and the other from the top. How to solve this problem, buy two tubes of toothpaste!
When you are speaking to your spouse, and on a day like today which is a fast day, be extra careful and be polite.
Now, we get to my real point here. If we have to be very careful of how we speak to our friends and family, how about how we speak to ourselves? My stepmother in Philadelphia told me this story this week. You know that in Philly it is very cold. She had to go out early in the morning to go to work, and instead of taking the keys, you know the ones which have all the keys to the house and the car, she took by mistake a different key chain. She didn't notice until she got on the other side of the front door, which closes automatically, locking itself.
She was outside at 7:30 am, no keys to the house, no keys to the car. She did have her purse and the cellphone! Thank goodness for that. While she was outside, she could have chosen to speak to herself in two ways, one positively or negatively. Which is the one that we most usually choose? Yup, you guessed it, the negative way. In the end, she called a locksmith and lots of money later, was able to get into her house, and get the car keys and off to work.
Does speaking negatively to ourselves, putting ourselves down really help the situation? It is like trying to write an important report for work when there is heavy construction taking place in your building the floor below yours. The noise can be so loud that you really don't think and can't find the solution to your problem.
If you can't find your car keys and you are looking for them, which is a better self-talk?
"Oh, I never find my keys! I'm so stupid for losing them, all the time!" Or " I put my keys in a really good place, now where would that be? "
I opt for the second. It is more helpful and leads me on the path to find the keys.
Rachael Alice Orbach
Life Coaching is the way to move ahead and get to your goals!
052-750-0608 call now for your 1st session for 50NIS
Rachael Alice Orbach Certified Master Life Coach - American University of NLP Certified Master NLP Practitioner - American University of NLP B.A.- UCLA Los Angeles www.lifecoachjerusalem.weebly.com Blog: www.lifecoachjerusalem.blogspot.com Skype: life-coach-jerusalem 052-750-0608
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